A marvelous horror movie, 1982’s Tobe Hooper/Steven
Spielberg Poltergeist is a terrific
entertainment, and one of my favorites of its kind. It’s a sustained piece of
slowly mounting haunted house tension, with warm family dynamics and small
creepy details eventually erupting in a spectacular crescendo of special
effects-driven freak outs. A quintessential portrait of early-80’s suburbia
wrapped up in skillful metaphor about expanding without regard for unintended
consequences (or evil sprits) unchecked sprawl might kick up, it’s one of those
films that has a time capsule quality, but has enough evergreen genre elements
to make it timeless. When it came time to remake Poltergeist, building an entirely new film on the bones of the old
was out of the question. Most of Gil Kenan’s remake is a bland updating,
content to riff on the original’s most famous moments, finding new and slightly
worse ways of doing everything.
The result is a contemporary Poltergeist of high competence, but little interest. It only works
because its inspiration is still a good movie, and following it closely is a
good way to make an effective little horror picture. This one plays like a
passable tween-friendly summer diversion. That’s not necessarily a bad thing.
You can almost imagine heading home for s’mores and giggles around the campfire
afterwards. Kenan’s film is brighter and lighter, with 3D and CGI taking the
place of practical effects, and rounder edges on the frights. It runs nearly 30
minutes shorter, adds an awfully conventional arc for a young boy from coward
to hero, and by and large keeps threats and moments of wit in a lower key. It’s
both a little more and a lot less than what you’d expect. Unfortunately a bunch
of clown dolls isn’t significantly creepier than one. Grown-ups sneaking a sip
of liquor isn’t as interesting as sharing a joint. Nor is ditching a realtor as
funny as pushing a TV for a concluding punchline.
But there’s entertainment value here, and screenwriter David
Lindsay-Abaire (of Rabbit Hole) does some
smart updating. Now the neighborhood isn’t new. It’s hollowed out with
foreclosures. The family moves into the house because of layoffs constraining
their finances. There’s a recessionary sadness hanging over the opening. How
were they to know their house was built on a cemetery? Sam Rockwell and
Rosemarie DeWitt play the parents, in a likable pair of performances. Their
kids, sullen teen (Saxon Sharbino), nervous boy (Kyle Catlett), and little girl
(Kennedi Clements), are the first to discover the haunting in their house, like
electric disruptions and strangely menacing trees and clown dolls. Then the
threat becomes very real when the youngest daughter is snatched by malevolent
spirits and held hostage in their ghostly realm.
Who they gonna call? A paranormal researcher (Jane Adams)
and a TV host (Jared Harris), of course. It all builds to flashes of nightmare
hallucinations, a portal to the spiritual plane opening up in a closet (and
looking a lot like Insidious on the
other side), and a suburban home barfing up its supernatural secrets. It’s
predictable button pushing, with fluid camerawork tracing digital intrusions
through an eerily normal house pulsing with malevolent creepiness. Never
particularly scary, it at least isn’t a desecration. It’s just barely enjoyable enough, I suppose. Kenan manages a brisk trot through some shivery concepts, efficiently deploying
fine effects while finding a good deal of charm in the actors. The kids are
sufficiently freaked out, and the adults get some dry one-liners to cut the
tension. It’s not a bad time at the movies, with some moderate chills over
before you know it.
As a fine example of what it is, I suppose you can shake off
the déjà vu and find comfort in familiar rhythms. But why settle for a competent,
but lesser, vision unless you absolutely have to? It’s hard not to wish the
exact same cast and crew had been put to use on a wholly original movie. Not only has this been done better before, but Kenan’s even done a
better family-friendly 80’s horror throwback before, his 2006 animated debut
feature Monster House, a fast, funny,
creepy good time. (Rent it and the original Poltergeist
and have yourself a good double feature.) Here’s hoping this big budget remake
allows the filmmakers opportunity to do more interesting original work in the
future.
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